My gut told me to write this but didn't give me a good title for it. Alas! Oh, and forgive the rambling.
Posted by Rebecca Tue, 05 May 2009 13:04:00 GMT
This post is for people who believe that G-d made people. If you don’t believe that, that’s fine, but you probably won’t get anything out of reading the rest of this post.
Ok. So. G-d made people. He made them each unique, with a specific design in mind, and a specific plan for their lives.
Unique. Specifically designed.
He knows our ins and outs. He knows how our brains and hearts work. He knows our favorite flavors of ice cream and our deepest fears and secrets.
There are 16 different personality types, according to the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. Whether or not you even believe in the MBTI, at least it provides evidence that humans have figured out that to some extent we are all different and unique and yada yada yada.
So, if we each are one-of-a-kind, and if G-d designed us to be that way, does it follow that G-d would only have one way of relating to us and that we would all have to figure out how to make that one way work? Or does it follow that G-d, being superfabulous and awesome as He is, would automatically know how to relate to us in ways that would speak to our unique ways of understanding and seeing the world?
Personally, I think it’s the latter. It makes no sense to me that G-d would expect an INFP to rely solely on empirical data, excel spreadsheets, and logical proofs to make every decision about everything in that person’s life.
Rather, wouldn’t G-d speak in a way that would be picked up by that person’s intuition? Wouldn’t that person be able to “feel” (for lack of a better word) the presence of G-d and know that He loved them?
I think when we pigeon hole G-d into one way of relating to people we not only reduce G-d to some one-dimensional being, but we also invalidate the experiences and faith journeys of people who maybe got to where they are by a different path. I’m not talking here of different gods. I’m talking about reason versus intuition.
I’m an INFP. I’m as intuitive as it gets. I make decisions based on my gut instinct. Sure. I seek wise counsel, I ask for prayer, I do research, I pray, and I weigh pros and cons. I am, in fact, perfectly capable of using my brain. But after I’ve done all that, I come to a point where I just know what to do. I can’t explain it any other way. I just know. I’m pretty sure this is because G-d makes things known to me at the right time.
Does G-d give me signs? I don’t ask for them, but I believe He does give me signs of confirmation that I’m going the right direction or that I should step back and wait something out. He also uses them to draw my attention to things that would otherwise escape my notice. G-d relates to me on my level, and because He is willing to do that, I know He loves me.
Does that mean if you don’t get signs G-d doesn’t love you or you are living disobediently or you are not special? Absolutely not. It just means He probably knows a better way of relating to you that is more personal, more intimate, and more tailored to the unique abilities and gifts He put in you. For some people this is intuition. For others, it’s excel spreadsheets full of data that display a trend. Both are equally valid. Remember, there are many parts to the one body and each part is different and serves a different purpose for the benefit and action of the whole.
I recently purchased a new-to-me car. I hadn’t even had it three hours when a car in front of kicked up a bunch of loose gravel and put several chips in my windshield. I was slightly ticked, but then just laughed at the situation. I figured G-d wanted to show me right off the bat that I need to hold my possessions with an open hand. And I do. I have a tendency to become over-attached to material possessions, likely because I come from a lower-income family and never really had anything super nice growing up. So I invest emotionally into empty objects and this is not good.
A more rational person may take issue with my assessment of the above experience. A more rational person may think that I felt I was being punished for loving material possessions. A more rational person may think that my theology is screwed up. This is likely because my experience doesn’t fit the rational person’s experience. A more rational person may believe that G-d gave us brains for reasoning and for processing the knowledge and wisdom given to us in the bible.
Here’s where I take issue with the rational person’s assessment. Who are any of us to say that G-d has only one way of working? Who are any of us to say G-d would never use real life experience, be it having your father thrown in prison a week before graduating high school or gravel hitting your new car, to teach us or remind us of spiritual truth? Who are any of us to invalidate, seriously or jokingly, anyone else’s experience and relationship with G-d?
If what is learned is backed up by scripture, if what is learned is solid truth, then who cares if it came by way of gravel on the road or a data trend in an excel spreadsheet?
I need to love and trust G-d and not be overprotective, over-in-love-with and greedy with my material possessions. I’m pretty sure that’s scriptural, so I’m pretty sure it’s valid.
After thinking and praying about it for a few days, this is what my gut tells me, so I’m going with it. Someone else may think I’m crazy. They may even think I’m messed up in the head. But I know G-d loves me and I know He teaches me and I know He will never leave me and I know all of this by experience, and if that’s how G-d has chosen to reveal spiritual truth to me, then I’ll take it.