Posted by Rebecca
Tue, 29 Sep 2009 13:41:00 GMT
Don’t know where to begin
Its like my world’s caving in
And I try but I can’t control my fear
Where do I go from here?
sometimes its so hard to pray
When You feel so far away
But I am willing to go
Where you want me to
God, I trust You
There’s a raging sea
Right in front of me
Wants to pull me in
Bring me to my knees
So let the waters rise
If You want them to
I will follow You
I will follow You
I will follow You
I will swim in the deep
‘Cuz You’ll be next to me
You’re in the eye of the storm
And the calm of the sea
You’ll never out of reach
God, You know where I’ve been
You were there with me then
You were faithful before
You’ll be faithful again
I’m holding Your hand
There’s a raging sea
Right in front of me
Wants to pull me in
Bring me to my knees
So let the waters rise
If You want them to
I will follow You
I will follow You
I will follow You
God Your love is enough
You will pull me through
I’m holding onto You
God Your love is enough
I will follow You
I will follow You
There’s a raging sea
Right in front of me
Wants to pull me in
Bring me to my knees
So let the waters rise
If You want them to
I will follow You
I will follow You
I will follow You
–Mikeschair
Posted in Along the Way | no comments
Posted by Rebecca
Wed, 16 Sep 2009 03:09:00 GMT
I think I’ve figured out why I’m having such a hard time trusting God these days.
In the past, I’ve had information about my circumstances and I’ve just worried needlessly about them. I’ve also had information about God’s unchanging character that I’ve been able to weigh against the circumstances and that’s helped me get through.
This time around, all I have is information about God’s character. I have no information about my circumstances. I don’t know what’s going on behind the scenes at all. I have put a lot on the line and honestly, I’m scared of losing it all.
So I have to lean on God’s character. God has never failed to come through for me. Not one time. But he’s invisible. He’s intangible. I want information. I want answers. I want to know what the hell is going on.
But I don’t get to. This is what happens when you say “God, I’m a control freak, teach me how to trust you.”
You get nothing. But you’re expected to keep going.
It’s a good lesson. But it’s damn hard.
Posted in Along the Way | no comments
Posted by Rebecca
Mon, 14 Sep 2009 19:20:00 GMT
There’s no escaping You now. I’m in way too deep. Everywhere I go I hear Your voice and I know You are with me.
I find myself willing to walk away from things that I know would make me happy, just because You have something else planned for me, L-rd. I don’t know what Your plans are, but I choose to believe they are good for me, because You said once time that they are.
This really sucks because my flesh finds denial of happiness really painful. I hate it. I can’t stand it. It makes my skin crawl. I want to scream. I’m sad. I’m miserable.
But somehow there’s joy in the midst of all of these fleeting, temporal, deceitful feelings.
I know things are going to be ok. I know You will work it out. And I guess that’s why I choose to continue seeking Your will in every aspect of my life. Because really, I couldn’t handle life without You. I need You so badly. I can’t even get through the day without finding a moment to spend with You, to share my hopes and dreams with You, to share my fears and disappointments and heartbreaks with You. You’re the only safe place I know.
I can’t get away. Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t. I’m too tied to You. I don’t think I could breathe if I thought for one second You had left me.
It doesn’t seem fair. My will is crushed to be conformed to Yours. My heart is broken so You can give me a new one. My flesh is put to death so I can really live.
It hurts. But it’s good. Sounds a bit masochistic, doesn’t it? Well, maybe it is, but the benefits far exceed the cost.
Keep me in this frame of mind. Keep me so dependent that I am constantly trying to find time to spend with You. I can’t live life any other way anymore. It just doesn’t work.
Posted in For Jehovah | no comments
