Posted by Rebecca
Mon, 08 Feb 2010 15:04:00 GMT
In Your ocean,
I’m ankle deep
I feel the waves crashin’ on my feet
It’s like I know where I need to be
But I can’t figure out, yeah I can’t figure out
Just how much air I will need to breathe
When Your tide rushes over me
There’s only one way to figure out
Will Ya let me drown, will Ya let me drown
Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire,
‘cause I just want something beautiful
To touch me,
I know that I’m in reach
‘Cause I am down on my knees,
I’m waiting for Something Beautiful
Oh, Something Beautiful
And the water is risin’ quick
And for years I was scared of it
We can’t be sure when it will subside
So I won’t leave Your side, no I can’t leave Your side
Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire,
‘cause I just want Something Beautiful
to touch me,
I know that I’m in reach
‘Cause I am down on my knees,
I’m waiting for Something Beautiful
Oh, Something Beautiful
In a daydream, I couldn’t live like this
I wouldn’t stop until I found Something Beautiful
When I wake up, I know I will have
No, I still won’t have what I need
Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire,
‘cause I just want Something Beautiful
to touch me,
I know that I’m in reach
‘Cause I am down on my knees,
I’m waiting for Something Beautiful
Oh, Something Beautiful
–Need to Breathe
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Posted by Rebecca
Tue, 15 Dec 2009 21:55:00 GMT
God is a God of new beginnings. He is a God of second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth and seventy times seven chances.
He restores all things, making them new. Out of His riches He dumps blessings on His children.
All of these attributes are aspects and evidence of His deep, deep grace.
He has extended this grace to me, before I even knew it existed. I’ve been seeking to know and understand His grace, and by His gracious nature He is opening my eyes, enabling me to see the oceans of grace with which He inundates my life.
By His grace, I am reconciled with those who have every right to blot me from their memory and never speak to me again.
By His grace He brought me safely home from Israel.
By His grace He took me safely to Israel.
By His grace He provided financially for me to go to Israel.
By His grace He invited me to Israel.
By His grace He gave me hope and a future, a community, and a family.
By His grace He made a way for me to be with Him, by providing His Son as payment for my sin. He gave what He loved most to save me from a bleak and otherwise inescapable fate.
By His grace He makes my heart to beat.
By His grace He makes me to draw breath.
By His grace I am alive.
By His grace He made me.
By His grace He wanted me to exist.
By His grace He imagined me.
Daily I bathe in a sea of blessings I can do nothing to earn. His grace engulfs me. I see it, hear it, touch it, taste it, smell it, and still I do not even come close to fully understanding it.
“What is man, that you make so much of him,
and that you set your heart on him?”
–Job 7:17
Take heart and be hopeful. We live in a graceless world, but we worship a gracious God.
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Posted by Rebecca
Sun, 22 Nov 2009 22:47:00 GMT
In a week I will be on a plane to Israel. I will be going to the Holy Land.
My brain is having a difficult time truly accepting this - not only that I’m going, but that it is a real place.
I’ve wondered lately what impact this trip will have on my faith, and of course I will only find out when it happens.
Realizing though that I have a hard time believing this place is real makes me wonder if I truly believe that Christ was a real man. I don’t question my salvation, but how much do I really believe?
I hope that when I am there the gravity of where I am and what it signifies hits me and stays with me. The last thing I want is for this to turn into another tourist experience. I will be in God’s land - the chosen land He promised to His chosen people. I will stand at the wailing wall, the closest point I can get to the place where the very presence of God rested on earth. The temple mount is the place where God chose to place His name forever. Forever means forever. It’s a big deal.
I am excited about this trip and a little nervous. God is real. The stories of His people are real - they were real people. David was a real man, a real king. Archaeologists are excavating his palace. I am nervous because, well, God is real which means His words are absolutely real and I must accept that on a level I’ve not accepted before….my life will change. I will come back different. Change is nerve-wracking, but no change that God has ever placed in front of me has been bad. Difficult, yes. Rewarding, yes. Bad, never.
I do not know how much access to the web I will have while over there, but I plan to journal every day, and when I get back I will post my entries here. Pray for me, those of you who believe.
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Posted by Rebecca
Tue, 20 Oct 2009 15:47:00 GMT
Eternal God, unchanging
Mysterious and unknown
Your boundless love unfailing
In grace and mercy shown
Bright seraphim in ceaseless flight
Around your glorious throne
Their voices raised both day and night
In praise to you alone
Hallelujah!
Glory be to our great God
Hallelujah!
Glory be to our great God!
Lord, we are weak and frail,
Helpless in the storm
Surround us with your angels
Hold us in your arms
Our cold and ruthless enemy
His pleasure is our harm
Rise up, oh Lord, and he will flee
Before our Sovereign God
Hallelujah!
Glory be to our great God!
Hallelujah!
Glory be to our great God!
Let every creature in the sea
And every flying bird
Let all the mountains, all the fields
And valleys of the earth
Let all the moons and all the stars
Throughout the universe
Sing praises to the Living God
Who rules them by His word
Hallelujah!
Glory be to our great God
Hallelujah!
Glory be to our great God!
(Not sure who the original artist is on this one)
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Posted by Rebecca
Tue, 20 Oct 2009 13:20:00 GMT
But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power;
Avoid such men as these.
For among them are those who enter into households and captivate weak women weighed down with sins, led on by various impulses, always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
Just as Jannes and Jambres opposed Moses, so these men also oppose the truth, men of depraved mind, rejected in regard to the faith.
But they will not make further progress; for their folly will be obvious to all, just as Jannes’s and Jambres’s folly was also.
Now you followed my teaching, conduct, purpose, faith, patience, love, perseverance, persecutions, and sufferings, such as happened to me at Antioch, at Iconium and at Lystra; what persecutions I endured, and out of them all the Lord rescued me!
Indeed, all who desire to live godly in Christ Jesus will be persecuted.
But evil men and impostors will proceed from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived.
You, however, continue in the things you have learned and become convinced of, knowing from whom you have learned them, and that from childhood you have known the sacred writings which are able to give you the wisdom that leads to salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.
All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work.
Lord, do not let me deny Your power. Let me seek Your obedience and righteousness about all things. Let me love You more than I love anything or anyone else. Teach me, reprove me, correct me, and train me. Fill me with Your spirit and implant in me a new and unquenchable zeal for You.
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Posted by Rebecca
Tue, 29 Sep 2009 13:41:00 GMT
Don’t know where to begin
Its like my world’s caving in
And I try but I can’t control my fear
Where do I go from here?
sometimes its so hard to pray
When You feel so far away
But I am willing to go
Where you want me to
God, I trust You
There’s a raging sea
Right in front of me
Wants to pull me in
Bring me to my knees
So let the waters rise
If You want them to
I will follow You
I will follow You
I will follow You
I will swim in the deep
‘Cuz You’ll be next to me
You’re in the eye of the storm
And the calm of the sea
You’ll never out of reach
God, You know where I’ve been
You were there with me then
You were faithful before
You’ll be faithful again
I’m holding Your hand
There’s a raging sea
Right in front of me
Wants to pull me in
Bring me to my knees
So let the waters rise
If You want them to
I will follow You
I will follow You
I will follow You
God Your love is enough
You will pull me through
I’m holding onto You
God Your love is enough
I will follow You
I will follow You
There’s a raging sea
Right in front of me
Wants to pull me in
Bring me to my knees
So let the waters rise
If You want them to
I will follow You
I will follow You
I will follow You
–Mikeschair
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Posted by Rebecca
Wed, 16 Sep 2009 03:09:00 GMT
I think I’ve figured out why I’m having such a hard time trusting God these days.
In the past, I’ve had information about my circumstances and I’ve just worried needlessly about them. I’ve also had information about God’s unchanging character that I’ve been able to weigh against the circumstances and that’s helped me get through.
This time around, all I have is information about God’s character. I have no information about my circumstances. I don’t know what’s going on behind the scenes at all. I have put a lot on the line and honestly, I’m scared of losing it all.
So I have to lean on God’s character. God has never failed to come through for me. Not one time. But he’s invisible. He’s intangible. I want information. I want answers. I want to know what the hell is going on.
But I don’t get to. This is what happens when you say “God, I’m a control freak, teach me how to trust you.”
You get nothing. But you’re expected to keep going.
It’s a good lesson. But it’s damn hard.
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Posted by Rebecca
Mon, 31 Aug 2009 21:08:00 GMT
So trusting G-d is bound to be rewarding, and from what I can see so far, it is. What’s going to happen is what is going to happen, so why worry?
Well, because apparently worry is my middle name. I need a new one.
Anyway, I never knew that learning trust meant having the carpet pulled out from under your feet and stumbling around in complete darkness. It’s pretty uncool. But I know there’s something good around the corner, so that’s what I’m holding onto. Meanwhile, my attitude just sucks and I’m utterly exhausted and emotionally spent. I don’t recognize myself right now. I want the happy-go-lucky back.
Good news, though. I moved into the condo I’m buying. The glitches are being worked out and if all goes well I should be able to close really soon.
Hopefully the reduced stress and some much needed solid sleep will help with the attitude and fatigue. Here’s hoping.
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Posted by Rebecca
Mon, 10 Aug 2009 13:53:00 GMT
I am sinking in a river that is raging.
I am drowning.
Will I ever rise to breathe again?
I wanna know why,
I just wanna understand.
Will I ever know why?
How could this be from Your hand?
/Chorus/
When every little thing that I have dreamed would be
just slips away like water through my hands,
And when it seems the walls of my belief come crashing down
like they’re all made of sand,
I won’t let go of You now
because I know, oh,
You’re not shaken.
I am trembling in the darkness of my own fear.
All the questions with no answers
So grip me while I’m here.
And I may never know why,
Oh I may not understand.
But I will lift up my eyes,
and trust this is Your plan.
/Chorus/
When every little thing that I have dreamed would be
just slips away like water through my hands,
And when it seems the walls of my belief come crashing down
like they’re all made of sand,
I won’t let go of You now
because I know, oh,
You’re not shaken.
I know You’re in the valley
of the shadow of death.
You’re not shaken.
You’re not shaken.
–Phil Stacey
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Posted by Rebecca
Fri, 07 Aug 2009 16:13:00 GMT
I work in an office where my primary objective is to help graduate students get through all the red tape surrounding getting a degree.
Every fall, new graduate students come in and most are in culture shock - some of them are new to the country and are not used to American culture and the American English accent (Queen’s English is largely what is taught abroad).
Some of them are in shock because they are from North Dakota and have never seen the mercury hit above 100 degrees.
All of them bring questions that I’ve known the answers to for years, and occasionally some of them bring new questions to me, like “Where can I find authentic Japanese noodles?”
Generally I consult the almighty Google, give them a map and send them on their way to explore and figure out life in Austin.
Today I had a new question. “Is there a Hindu shrine in Austin, and if so, will you help me find it.”
I immediately searched on Google to help this guy out. He has been in America for all of two days - he’s probably just getting over jetlag, is adapting to new foods (which means he probably doesn’t feel too good) and is trying to get a jump start on the red tape because he knows he’s in for a lot of adjustments.
I located a couple of shrines and gave him the website information. I also pointed him to the UT cricket club, which I know is full of Indian students, and I suggested he get involved there and ask some of those students to help him find a place of worship.
I did my job. He was very grateful.
After he left, I couldn’t help but feel a little guilty. See, I’m a Christian, and I believe that Hinduism is a form of idolatry. It is my personal belief. I don’t require anyone else to believe that. This is not about religious judgment. It’s about me being true to my G-d and my faith. In a way, I feel like I wasn’t, but in doing my job to the utmost of my ability, I feel like I was.
But I can’t shake the feeling that I was encouraging idolatry. Maybe I’m making more of this than I should, and if anyone still reads this blog, feel free to share your thoughts on the matter.
Posted in Along the Way | 2 comments
