Relatively Recent Research On Patients with PTSD
[ Posted by Rebecca Fri, 05 Sep 2008 04:12:12 GMT ]
How Many Times Will The Rooster Crow?
[ Posted by Rebecca Wed, 03 Sep 2008 02:33:29 GMT ]
It seems that everyone thinks a rooster only crows at dawn.
Well, I’ve been around a lot of roosters on my grandmother’s farm, and I can tell you this. A rooster begins crowing at least an hour before dawn, and continues to crow all day long until shortly after sundown.
It’s obnoxious. Ask any of my fifteen cousins.
Some recent episodes have got me thinking about roosters, particularly because of Peter’s three denials of Christ the night Christ was betrayed. Christ told Peter that he would deny the Son of Man three times before the cock crowed. And Peter lived up to that prophecy.
I’ve lately been listening to streaming Christian radio on headphones at work, mostly to drown out the insane gum smacking that I am otherwise subject to eight hours a day. Inevitably someone asks me what I listen to.
Commence an internal freak-out that calms down only when I lie.
Today as I was walking to the bus, I was listening to Kutless on my ipod and I ran into an old co-worker, who of course asked me what I was listening to.
Of course, I lied.
In my mind, I heard that dadburn rooster.
The sound of it hit me hard.
Sure, I can talk about my faith all day long in the company of other Christians, or certain friends, and my family. I can write about my faith pseudo-anonymously on the internet, where a general lack of identity protects me from the scorn of the world.
But when given 900 opportunities to have a real conversation about my faith, I cower and by doing so, deny people the pleasure of experiencing any amount of G-d’s light that can make it through my broken self.
I fail. Daily.
I began to ponder my actions, and ponder my motives for allowing those actions to persist.
In fear, I wondered if I am ashamed of my Messiah.
See, I don’t want this:
“For whoever is ashamed of Me and My words in this adulterous and sinful generation, the Son of Man will also be ashamed of him when He comes in the glory of His Father with the holy angels.” Mark 8:38, NASB
I want to please my L-rd, and I know I do not do that by concealing Him.
So then I thought, it must be all those crazy Christian extremists out there, who would rather bomb an abortion clinic than to reach out to the women who have had to face an incredibly difficult choice. The ignorant ones who think the n-word is ok. The ones who are blind enough to believe they are superior to Jews.
But that still didn’t seem correct.
Because, duh. I’m not ashamed of admitting I’m a Christian because of Christ, or because of other Christians out there who I fail to agree with on certain things.
I’m ashamed of admitting I’m a Christian because most of the time, I don’t act like one.
I judge people. I gossip. I complain about everything and everyone under the sun. I worry. I’m afraid of a lot of things that I don’t need to be afraid of. I make pleasing people a priority over pleasing G-d.
See, I don’t want to be the reason someone turns away from G-d.
But if I hide Him from them, will they turn back to Him?
Supreme Moslem Council: Temple Mount is Jewish
[ Posted by Rebecca Wed, 03 Sep 2008 02:06:28 GMT ]
Contrary to popular Islamic belief, the Temple Mount is historically Jewish.
By what authority do I state this? By G-d, by Jewish historians, and by a 1925 publication of the Supreme Muslim Council.
Thanks to Phil for sending this out.
Hemidactylus frenatus
[ Posted by Rebecca Mon, 01 Sep 2008 14:14:25 GMT ]
There’s nothing quite like waking up in the morning only to discover that you’ve slept on top of one of these and managed to grind it into the sheets you just washed yesterday.
Question of the Day
[ Posted by Rebecca Wed, 27 Aug 2008 19:29:41 GMT ]
Dear God,
I know you are sovereign and wise and all that stuff, but I have just one question.
Why did you make me so high-strung? What purpose does this accomplish?
My sensitivity to gum smackers is going to land me in an asylum. I really can’t handle it. Really.
It is possible to request that this be fixed? Could you just make it so that it doesn’t bother me? I’ve already tried to re-educate the entire country on what it means to have good manners and that failed miserably. Apparently, I’m the one who will have to change in this situation since the rest of the population is determined to be rude.
Just so you know.
Thanks,
Me
I Hope I Live To See This Become a Reality
[ Posted by Rebecca Fri, 22 Aug 2008 14:16:01 GMT ]
Enough said.
Murphy, go home. Nobody wants you here.
[ Posted by Rebecca Thu, 21 Aug 2008 16:34:50 GMT ]
Did the copier have to break the day that I need to make 35 copies of a 25-page orientation packet?
That was yesterday. It is still broken.
Today.
Did the 3-hole punch have to break the day that I have to hole punch 45 multi-page documents for a faculty promotion packet? Tenure is on the line here. Seriously.
Count down 30 minutes until I was able to find another one in my 10 story building that I could borrow to get through the day. Apparently, it’s promotion packet season.
And the only white 2-inch binder in the entire building that wasn’t claimed by someone already was also damaged.
Update
[ Posted by Rebecca Mon, 18 Aug 2008 19:52:14 GMT ]
I turned my final paper in for my summer class this morning.
Four classes to go.
I'm about done.
[ Posted by Rebecca Fri, 15 Aug 2008 15:51:05 GMT ]
Ever felt like you were just about done? Out of energy, out of patience, out of steam?
Maybe even out of caring?
I’m there today. Yesterday was absolutely terrible. I spent a few minutes in tears in the bathroom at work. I was about ready to quit my job, even though I love the people. I didn’t love a single one of them yesterday. I went to work early, got home late, and didn’t get anything done. Because of people.
I hadn’t slept well the night before because I was waking up hourly with cramps, and pretty much all day I couldn’t get them to go away. I probably about put a hole in my stomach because I took so much advil.
My nerves are so raw. Everything tiny little thing annoys the crap out of me. I feel like I may remove the head of the next person who smacks their gum around me, or incessantly taps their pencil in class, or eases over into the turn lane without using their directional.
There were two small redeeming factors from last night that sort of salvaged the day and gave me what I needed to come into work today.
1) I got three pages of my four page paper written. Yup. That’s right. After all that yesterday, I had to write a paper. Fanfreakingtastic.
2) I got to spend a little time with Dom in my own home. No concrete floors. No unfinished walls. No wallpaper shreds all over the kitchen. It was comfortable and relaxing and exactly what I needed. He somehow managed to completely diffuse the ticking time bomb that was me, just by being himself. He’s awesome like that.
I’m hoping that this weekend will provide me with some much needed down time. Otherwise, it won’t be pretty come Monday.
Another Answer
[ Posted by Rebecca Thu, 14 Aug 2008 16:03:34 GMT ]
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